No Contact Isn’t Just a Rule… It’s a Lifestyle!

 

I know, I know. You’ve got so much to say, but deep down, you know good and damn well there’s no one left to say it to. And let’s be real, there’s only so many times you can try to explain yourself, argue your worth, or keep going back to a well that’s been dry for months or even years.

 

No contact? It’s not just about blocking their number or unfollowing them on social media. Nah, it’s deeper than that. No contact will show you whether or not you have one crucial character trait that’s essential for healing: discipline.

 

And I’m not just talking about the discipline to hit the gym, set a new schedule, or work on yourself in practical ways. Nah! I’m talking about the discipline to maintain it. The discipline to push beyond your own expectations, to set proper boundaries, to practice self-love, and to make no contact a way of life.

 

Still doesn’t make sense yet? Let me explain…

 

We Turn Our Identity Into the Relationship

 

See, we have this habit of turning our entire identity into the relationship. And that’s not to say you weren’t successful, didn’t have a life, or didn’t have balance. But? And this is a big ass but… it is to say that when things started going south, if you’re a fixer, an empath, someone who cares deeply, forgives often, and is used to saving people from their own demise, you did it to the detriment of your own well-being.

 

You started apologizing for things you didn’t do wrong.

You started taking accountability for their actions.

You started forgiving unforgivable behavior all in the name of “love”.

 

There’s only so many times you can put yourself last, not feel considered, not feel appreciated, before you hit a breaking point. And when you do? The only option left is to go no contact and let your silence speak all the words, actions, and behaviors you once tried to give them before the breakup.

 

Now’s the Time to Piece It All Together

 

And now? Now’s as good a time as any to start piecing together what really went wrong. Let’s get honest:

– Were you really a match with your ex?

– Did they give you their all, their best?

– Did they give and show you respect?

– Were you truly valued and appreciated? And if you were, was it consistent?

– Did they communicate their issues effectively?

– Did they step out on the relationship?

– Did you constantly catch them in lies?

– Did they manipulate you, convincing you that you mattered, yet never showed accountability when they were wrong?

 

And on the flip side:

– Did you speak up for yourself?

– Did you love yourself more or less when you were together?

– Were you genuinely happy?

– Did your discernment scream at you that you were in a place you didn’t belong?

– Did your empathy turn into sympathy for them?

– Were you together for the right reasons, or were you afraid to walk away because of the kids, the money, the comfort, or the time investment you’ll never get a refund on?

 

What Silence Teaches Us

 

We learn a lot about ourselves in silence. We learn what we’re willing to tolerate. We learn if the grief we’re feeling is really about our ex or if there are other unresolved issues and traumas we need to address.

 

So, be patient. Because in order to reveal the truth about what love *should* look and feel like, we first have to have it for ourselves. But that takes grace. It takes discipline. It takes the ability to maintain it, build with it, and then share it with someone else in the future.

 

You’ve Got a Whole YOU to Focus On

 

In the meantime? You’ve got a whole you that needs your undivided attention during this no-contact journey. This is your time to:

– Rebuild your self-worth.

– Reconnect with your passions.

– Heal from the trauma you’ve endured.

– Set boundaries that protect your peace.

– Learn to love yourself in a way no one else ever could.

 

No contact isn’t just about them, it’s about you. It’s about reclaiming your power, your identity, and your life. And if you do it right? You’ll come out stronger, wiser, and ready to attract the kind of love you truly deserve.

 

So, block, delete, and focus on you. Not out of spite, but out of self-respect. Because you? You’ve got this.

 

Stay Inspired,

Weav

Marcus Weaver,

Weav Told Me LLC.

Sunday March 23rd, 2025